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Your essay demonstrates a good understanding of the topic and addresses both views effectively. However, to improve your score, focus on developing your arguments more thoroughly, using smoother transitions, and correcting spelling and grammatical errors. Simplifying complex sentences and ensuring the precise use of vocabulary will also enhance the overall clarity and coherence of your essay.

Some people believe that education is the key to tackling hunger worldwide while others feel that the answer is in food aid.

Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
There is an argument when it comes to the solutions of tackling hunger worldwide including food aid and education. In this essay below, I will discuss both views and provide my opinion on the given statement.
Education is one of the most recommended ways to solve the hunger problems in the whole world. It can be easily observed that educated people will find way to have a job properly, so they can afford their own meals without any aids. Futhermore, if everyone who is sufferring from poverty taught to earn money in the right ways, they will no longer need for food aid, and based on a recent research in VietNam, the result turns out that most of educated people tent to get over the poverty and hunger situation by themsevle up to 60%. To sum up, hunger issue would be easily solved if the financially disadvantaged individuals were pointed out how to earn money on their own.
On the other hand, there is a significent number of people saying that giving food aid is the most practical answer for the hunger in the earth. By far, there were tons of foods which were sent to the people in hunger situation and that would not last for a long time. For instance, people who were given foods do not actually have ability to figure out how to make or afford meals because all they did were just receiving packages without putting any efforts. That illustrates that giving is not always the best way to stop the hunger worldwide.
In conclusion, perhaps there are a number of people thinking food aid is the answer for the hunger, but it will not last, whereas, education is the main factor to completely solve the hunger issue.

Overall Feedback

Your essay demonstrates a good understanding of the topic and addresses both views effectively. However, to improve your score, focus on developing your arguments more thoroughly, using smoother transitions, and correcting spelling and grammatical errors. Simplifying complex sentences and ensuring the precise use of vocabulary will also enhance the overall clarity and coherence of your essay.

4 paragraphs

290 words

6.0

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