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Your essay partially addresses the task but lacks development and structure. To improve, ensure you fully address both sides of the argument, use a wider range of vocabulary, and pay close attention to grammar and sentence structure. Consider expanding your essay to include more detailed reasoning and examples to support your opinion.

Some educators believe that every child should be taught how to play a musical instrument.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Statistically, many instructors trust that children need to be taught to play an instrumental music.

In my opinion, there are
a lot of advantages about the child place importance on musical instrument. According to the science-research information, the effective easily can be see in physical health is creativity, smarter and innovation. Not only physical healthy but also improve mental health like it makes them have a sense of achievement, reduce stress and happier when they get into that. At the beginning, a kid will be uncomforted, depressed or maybe extremely hated that but on the other hand, it trains their constancy gradually. After that, they will reserve all the benefits above.

Overall, playing a musical instrument helps children develop all
accessibilities comprehensively during a child's life.

Overall Feedback

Your essay partially addresses the task but lacks development and structure. To improve, ensure you fully address both sides of the argument, use a wider range of vocabulary, and pay close attention to grammar and sentence structure. Consider expanding your essay to include more detailed reasoning and examples to support your opinion.

3 paragraphs

124 words


5.0

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